Countdown

Two days to go. Then Sue and I will kiss the kids goodbye, give the dog an extra Schmacko, leave a fire extinguisher on the kitchen table and fly off for the first instalment of ... the Sulawesi Project. Our mission? To save the world’s chocolate supply from an evil fungus called vascular streak dieback. Well, that’s actually really Sue’s mission, or more accurately her honours research project in ecology, and as a scientist she probably wouldn’t say ‘evil’, but, well, she can be all sciencey in her own blog. My own role in the adventure is a complex mixture of language/cultural advisor, iPad solar rechargist, food taster and general factotum.

Having recently edited two Indonesian language textbooks for high school students, I am thoroughly up to speed with the everyday phrases of Jakartan teenagers, viz:

• Saya mau menjadi teman kamu di Facebook. [I’d like to add you to the list of people who can see my gallery of selfies online.]

• Saya suka mendownload musik alternatif di iPod saya. [I think you might be able to work that one out yourself.]

Great ice-breakers though they might be, I’m not sure these phrases will get me far with the cocoa growers of Sulawesi. Instead, I am boning up with more appropriate vocabulary, such as:

• Apakah pohon kakao Anda terserang jamur? Is your cocoa tree afflicted by fungus?
• Tolong tunjukkan saya pohon yang paling sehat. Please show me your healthiest tree.
• Apakah selalu begitu panas dan hujan di sini, atau mungkin kita datang pada waktu yang kurang sempurna? Is it always this hot and rainy here, or did we just come at a bad time?
• Saya tahu Ramadan sekarang, tetapi apakah kami bisa dapatkan bir dekat sini? I know it's Ramadan, but could we get a beer somewhere nearby?
• Maaf, saya berbicara tidak tepat. Sorry, that was inappropriate.

* * *

So, what do we know about Sulawesi?

Well, it is that funny shaped island that looks like a scorpion about to strike, located between New Guinea and Borneo. In olden times it was called Celebes, but people found that too hard to pronounce.

View Larger Map

Makassar, the capital, is right down on the southern peninsula, about one hour by air from Denpasar (Bali). It will be our first port of call and,I imagine, the place we will run to if life in the rural outposts proves to be too much for our soft Brunswick sensibilities.

Makassar is famous for a type of soup called Coto Makassar, made from beef and beef entrails such as tripe, liver, lungs, etc. [Note to self: be sure to learn the phrase for ‘I am a vegetarian’: Saya hanya makan sayuran.] 

Happily they also do a great line in seafood. [Also learn: ‘But I do eat seafood!’ Tetapi saya makan hidangan laut juga.].

From Makassar we will be heading off on a 10-day tour of the cocoa farms that are taking part in the research trials. First stop will be the wonderfully named Polewali. Once we get started on the actual data gathering, Polewali will probably be our first ‘base camp’. What is it like? Unfortunately the internet is not a mine of information on the town of Polewali. Perhaps this humble blog will help to put Polewali on the tourist trail. [‘Hey, what did you do on your holidays bro?’ ‘Hung out in Polewali. Had some awesome Coto Makassar.’ ‘Sick!’ ‘Yeah.’, etc.]

Unlike Melbourne’s eccentric summer weather [41, 25, 39, 28, etc.], the temperatures in Sulawesi are amazingly consistent all year round. 

The climate graph for Makassar:

Note the difference between the "cold" and "warm" seasons! (Source: weatherspark.com)

is the closest thing you are likely to find to two straight lines. In the 'cold season' it gets to 30 degrees, with a low of 21. In the 'warm season' it gets to 32, with a low of 22.

The things that do vary, though, are the humidity and the rainfall.

(Source: weatherspark.com)

Yes, we are going in the rainy season and yes, we will possibly end up as two warm puddles on the outskirts of Polewali.

How will we survive?

In the style of Western explorers throughout history, and with some help from our friends, we have assembled a formidable arsenal of technology to help us collect and analyse data, communicate with family and friends back home, and play Angry Birds.

The pride of the pack is a Solar Gorilla solar charger and its cousin the Mini Gorilla battery (thanks Rory). So ...

• will it all work in the rain, heat and humidity?
• will we find food that doesn't contain entrails??
• is the language I have been learning really Indonesian, or some gibberish made up by a cartel of evil pranksters???
• will we stop the deadly fungus from cutting off the world's chocolate supply????

Stayed tuned.

© 2014 Steve Dobney